Dear Denisa and Richard,
it has been three weeks that my husband and I attended your course at Váňa’s farm, and I would like to share my positive experience that we gained there with you.
We have been together with my husband for 23 years. We have experienced good and bad times, but the last nearly two years have been so critical that I almost came to the decision to get a divorce. We tried to solve our crisis one year ago, but nothing changed that time and my husband didn’t fight for our relationship. Everything was getting worse and this year, it escalated in my decision not to stay in a relationship in which I was only a maid and a cook. In a relationship where I was not equal partner and wife. We lived together only as two roommates. I won’t even talk about our intimate life.
And so, in April, after many fights, I have made the decision. “It’s over.” My husband was supposed to go to spa for three days. First, we were supposed to go there together but I was not interested anymore. On the day of his departure, he asked me what it was that I actually wanted, and I said I wanted a divorce. This apparently made him concerned and he left quickly. We stayed alone for three days and I was worried about what would happen next and I was concerned about my husband coming back home.
However, something happened, something what I did not expect at all. Suddenly, my husband started fighting for us and we finally started communicating (in writing) with each other again. In this couple of messages, we told each other more than we did in the last two years. I revealed to him that because of his attitude towards me, he killed all my love and feelings for him in me. I did not feel anything but emptiness. I felt as if I lived with a stranger I was no longer attached to.
After three days, my husband returned home, and we talked about everything again. That time it was calm, with no reproach, fight or negative emotions. He was asking me to give us one more chance. I asked him whether he was ready to do it in spite of me having no feelings for him at that moment, and I told him there would be no touching, hugging or kissing. He said he still wanted to try and that he would give me as much time as I needed. So, we gave each other one “last” chance to save our marriage.
During our entire crisis, I had a great support of my family and friends, and especially of my soulmate, who went through everything with me and who probably opened my husband’s eyes later. My husband had nobody. He was alone and did not have the courage to ask someone for advice or share his worries with someone.
One day, a good friend of mine asked me out for lunch, and he suggested we could take part in your course for couples to save our marriage. He made the suggestion based on his own experience. He sent me a link to your web site, and I watched a video where Deniska was talking about what the course is about and what the aim of the course is. In the evening, I showed it to my husband asking if he would be willing to do something like that. He agreed without hesitation.
The coincidence was that the course was supposed to be in three weeks! So I didn’t hesitate and sent the application right away.
The D-day came and we were to leave. On Friday morning, we managed to watch a video where a married couple described their experience with the course and said that they fell in love again. I smirked a little at the thought that this was definitely not possible.
However, there were three amazing days full of emotions, joy, pain, tears and laughter or dancing. Less than three days of self-knowledge, understanding, discovering mutual intimacy and seeking the way back to our hearts.
During the three-day course, Deniska and Richard were able to teach and understand us more than we had in our 23 years of marriage. Suddenly, we found ourselves somewhere where everything about love, sex, mutual intimacy and communication was openly discussed, without restraints, shame and prejudice. Where someone expressed all our feelings, worries, hidden thoughts for us. Where everything concerning the relationship between a man and a woman was broken down to the last tiny, important detail.
As a woman, I had missed tender touches, kisses, hugs and gentle, long lovemaking for years. I really hated fast sex without foreplay, but on the other hand, I was glad it was quickly over.
And suddenly, there was someone who gave us guidelines on how to show affection and love through gentle, long lovemaking, conscious lovemaking, and that it is not always necessary, no matter what, to reach the peak of both partners. And so, night by night, we were enjoying that fully.
What we have experienced in this course is really impossible to describe. You just have to experience that for yourself.
On Sunday, after not even three days, my husband and I left the Váňa’s farm really in love again. What we did not believe and at what we smiled on Friday morning actually happened.
Today, for three weeks now, we are still smiling at each other and we enjoy every possible moment together. After years, we go to bed together again and we go early in the evening so that we have enough time to enjoy conscious lovemaking. If, for some reason, there is not enough time for that, we are at least “spooning”. (We both love this expression).
Deniska, you are, together with Richard, changing lives of hundreds of people and I wish you that this mission will last as long as possible, and that you will continue to reconcile all couples that are going through a difficult period of their lives. I wish there weren’t many couples, but in today’s hectic time full of divorce proceedings, it’s just a pious wish.
And so, it is wonderful that there is someone who can show us the way back to ourselves and the way to find the lost love, understanding, mutual tolerance, respect and tenderness. You are both really doing a great job and both of us are sincerely grateful that we are having even more beautiful moments today than when we met.
On the course, we drew a thick line behind everything that bothered us, divided us and hurt us. After the course, we started a new married life with a clear shield, and already during the fourth evening I was able to tell my husband honestly from the bottom of my heart what he had been waiting for so patiently. “I LOVE YOU.”
By the way… no one around us understands this rapid transformation. They don’t believe what miraculous happened to us, but everyone is very happy about it. Especially our 22-year-old daughter.
With deep respect and gratitude, your Renča (45) and Ladislav (54) Horečtí.
PS: We were very pleased with your invitation to Retreat for couples II for advanced, and without hesitation we both agreed that if possible, we will definitely participate, and we are already looking forward to what we will learn and what will revive our relationship again.
© Mgr. Denisa Říha Palečková, 2020
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